It's Just Lunch :: Press Center

Dates on a plane: How to make a love connection at 30,000 feet

Air passengers can be divided into roughly two types: those who chat up their seatmates and those who doggedly avoid it.

I put myself in the latter group, not because I'm anti-social, but because once a conversation starts, I'm worried there'll be no turning it off and I usually have other things to do.

But I know quite a few people who've struck up friendships -- or more -- from encounters at 30,000 feet. My friends Dave and Daphne met on a flight from Boise to Phoenix 20-some years ago and they're still happily (as far as I know) married.

PJ Osgood, founder of the matchmaking service It's Just Lunch was in the no-chat camp until recently when she met a guy from a flight between Houston and Chicago and they decided to share a cab into the city.

"We had this great conversation and we exchanged business cards and the next day we went out to dinner," Osgood says.

A love connection was not to be (no chemistry, she says), but he was worth meeting, and this got Osgood, a frequent traveler, thinking she's been missing opportunities aloft.

First off, if you're a busy professional, she reasons, your chances are high of meeting other busy professionals while flying. And since being on a plane is "like detention, you've got all this time when you can connect with someone," you might as well put it to good use.

The last time I was seated next to someone attractive enough for me to entertain any notions of connectedness, it was on a flight to Salt Lake City and he was a Mormon father of five. But being a professional matchmaker, Osgood is way ahead of me on this.

Among her strategies:

• When open seating (a la the Southwest Airlines' model) is an option, go for it. Board somewhere in the middle of the pack so by the time you're walking down the aisle, you can assess who you might want to sit next to. Then, take the middle seat. (Oh, yeah, she adds, check the ring finger; she's not advocating adultery.)

• Carry business cards. If you do hit it off, exchanging cards is a natural way to exchange information.

• Be generous. If you have free drink coupons, for instance, offering to share is a great ice breaker.

• If you're headed in the same general direction once you land, consider sharing a cab or shuttle.

"It's important to look approachable by putting away the laptop or turning off the iPod," Osgood says. "You never know when you're going to find that person you connect with."

~ USA Today

Want to Meet Your Future Spouse This Halloween? Try a French Maid or Fireman Costume.

It’s Just Lunch, the premier dating service for busy professionals surveyed over 1,000 singles and found that this Halloween, 46% of singles will be attending or holding costume parties this year, up from 32% in 2006. Looks like the cocooning trend is fading at last.

Can you really meet your future mate at a Halloween party? Forty-six percent (46%) of those polled think you can, and in fact that this is a great place to meet singles. Forty-seven percent (47%), however, say they would never show up solo to a Halloween costume party – not even in disguise. Men are more likely to attend solo; 57% say it’s the best place to meet single women, while 50% of women say they would never show up solo to a Halloween costume party.

When it comes to tastes, it seems men will never tire of that good old Halloween “classic” – a sexy French maid costume. For the past five years, men have voted “the French maid” the costume they would most prefer to see women wear. In fact, 56% of men say that they would be most attracted to a woman in a sexy costume. Vampire came in a close second at 20%. On the other hand, “no costume” was the least appealing option to the men surveyed. Interestingly, however, when asked which kinds of costumes made women easier to approach, funny costumes (42%) took the lead over sexy (19%). (And ladies, before you start dressing like a zombie, know that only 3% of men polled thought it was easy to approach a woman in a scary costume.)

Women find it the easiest to approach men in a funny costume (at 45%), followed closely by original (39%); sexy (8%) and scary (1%). The strong masculine costumes apparently never go out of style either - 40% of women say heroes (cops, firemen) in uniform will definitely catch their attention most at a Halloween costume party followed by pirates (30%).

And once again, fantasy beat out reality in the famous character costume race. Men are nine times more likely to dress up as Iron Man than Chris Matthews (with Glen Beck pulling in a 10% of votes). Females were more likely to dress up as a “Desperate Housewife” (41%) than Nancy Pelosi (3%).

About It’s Just Lunch
It's Just Lunch is a specialized dating service for busy singles. IJL’s dating specialists save busy singles from the frustration of having to search through seas of online profiles, or play endless e-mail tag. The company, which has arranged more than two million first dates in the past 19 years, handles everything in a personalized and efficient manner – from finding the right matches to making all the arrangements for a date, at a nice location for lunch, brunch or after-work drinks. It's Just Lunch was founded in 1991 and has grown to service over 150 cities within the U.S. and internationally, and has many wonderful success stories. For more information visit
www.itsjustlunch.com

~ PR.com

Frightening fall weather bringing singles together for Halloween

Dating companies such as Divine Intervention, It’s Just Lunch and Executive Search Dating have all been growing during the past few years and all notice business starts improving in October.

“There’s definitely a change after the Labour Day weekend. Peoples’ mindset starts changing. The summer is behind us. Many people have a lot of plans over the summer and don’t have time to meet new people,” said Paddi Rice, president of Executive Search Dating.

“September is also very busy. Then October hits you and, all of a sudden, people realize that potentially there’s six months of pretty miserable weather. They won’t be walking on a beach as much, So, I think that’s why people tend to get a bit more serious at this time of year.”

Rice’s company has grown from setting up about 100 dates per month two years ago to setting up about 200 dates per month now.

Revenue has steadily grown at 30% to 50% annually and he projects he will be approaching $500,000 in revenue by the end of 2010.

He urges singles to plan ahead for Halloween and not get stuck at home handing out candy.

One good thing about Halloween parties, Rice added, is that being in costume enables singles to be bolder when approaching someone.

~ Business in Vancouver

Pursuit of romance surprises

Where on Earth are all the smart, single, attractive men? I must get that question at least once a week on Kiss FM and maybe every other day on Facebook.

I keep trying to tell my single sisters that I am no dating expert, but I do have an opinion about most things, especially being single and dating.

Although some people may find my opinions on the matter useful and interesting, there is something to be said for giving the cold, hard facts. So ... here are a few cold, hard facts that might come as a surprise to you. They certainly came as a surprise to me.

According to a report by It's Just Lunch, when men were asked to indicate the body type they are most attracted to, they typically picked the average female figure. Hmmm, great news, and here I thought I had to get into a pair of size 4 skinny jeans.

This one really knocked me for a loop: The dating statistics also show that looks are not really a deal breaker and that personality actually does matter. Sixty-seven percent of single men in the U.S. and 86 percent of single women in the U.S. find that someone who smiles a lot is a bigger turn-on over someone who is physically attractive but has no personality.

In an age where there appears to be a shortage of middle-age men, are women really stuck on dating men their own age? Not according to a 2003 study by AARP. In the study, 35 percent of middle-age American women said they preferred to date younger men. According to the U.S. Census, 12 percent of marriages are between older women and younger men. All I can say is it's about doggone time!

As with all dating situations, what about chemistry? Men, as expected, are less tolerant about chemistry and more cautious about wasting their time if the sparks don't fly on the first date. Sixty-eight percent of men would not waste their time and wouldn't go on a second date if there was no chemistry on the first date. Women, on the other hand, will give it a second chance -- 56 percent of women would go on a second date and hope chemistry develops.

Even with all these facts, I'm sure I'll continue to have women ask me where the good men are, so here is one last tip.

Try checking out the Dads In Action Bachelor Auction at 7 p.m. Oct. 29 at Sacred Heart Cultural Center.

I hear it's going to be an elegant affair, and because it's a fundraiser that will help Dads in Action perform its mission of direct support to the Richmond County school system, it's for a very good cause.

So, ladies, even if you don't find Mr. Right at the bachelor auction, remember that statistically, you're the catch. Just wait for the right bait.

~ The Augusta Chronicle

Love in the air: how to pick up on a plane

At cruising altitude, as the seatbelt sign switches off and fellow passengers start reaching for a good book, their iPod or a trusty laptop, Kevin D. is reaching out to them. In friendship, initially. But three times so far, it’s turned into something more.

“It’s not like I’m going to try to pick up women on a plane; I just happen to be around planes quite a bit,” says the 44-year-old Los Angeles native, an international development aid consultant who lives and works now in Kenya (and doesn’t want to give his last name). “Where else am I going to meet somebody?”

Kevin D. once dated his seatmate, whom he got to know after their flight to Washington, D.C., was stranded on the tarmac during a snowstorm. Another girlfriend: a flight attendant returning from a vacation in Thailand. And a simple “So, where are you headed?” directed to an attractive stranger at a snack counter in Amsterdam Airport Schiphol a few years ago was all it took to unbridle a day of meaningful conversations in the terminal, capped by a spicy make-out session at the gate.

As easy as Kevin D. makes it seem, though, frequent fliers who live out of suitcases and eat alone in hotel bars complain often that their solitary, transient lifestyle makes it harder to date, let alone nurture a relationship. But experts agree that the consultant’s carpe diem approach is ideal for finding love in the air.

“There are two types of people: the ones who take advantage of every opportunity to meet somebody and others who go on automatic pilot as soon as they board,” says P.J. Osgood, a franchise owner with It’s Just Lunch, which sets up drink dates for busy professionals worldwide.

During a flight, introduce yourself to seatmates instead of pulling out the in-flight magazine. Pre-select a middle seat if you can, to guarantee a potential date on either side. Carry gum, since raunchy breath isn’t attractive, and keep a handy supply of business cards as a neutral way to give out your number, Ms. Osgood advises.

And after touching down, consider sharing a ride into town – it’s a tip the matchmaker herself tested six months ago in Chicago, when she was approached in the taxi line by a guy who ended up inviting her to a couple of “very nice” dinners.

Many of Ms. Osgood’s clients are requesting dates in every city they fly to. But Patty Shapiro, founder of Dating a la Carte in Montreal, thinks it’s more genuine to date monogamously, in one city at a time: “When you see somebody once a month in another city, it’s all about the sex,” says Ms. Shapiro, a self-described old-fashioned matchmaker, who is also a corporate headhunter. “You’re going to get right down to it because time is so precious.”

New data this month from the British pollster Skyscanner seem to support suspicions that sex is still the most sought-after airborne encounter. Twenty-one per cent of 400 respondents said they’ve already joined the Mile High Club, often with a stranger they met on a flight. And 94 per cent were keen to join – especially with someone other than their romantic partner. A naughty 6 per cent fantasized exclusively about the cabin crew.

To maximize compatibility and weed out daters who aren’t interested in a serious relationship, frequent fliers should consider mates who share their jet-setting ways, and steer conversation toward finding out if both are “on the same level, morally, socially, financially, religiously – every aspect,” Ms. Shapiro says.

Weather delays, technical problems with a plane or a missed connection are all effective icebreakers. In Clio Sinclair’s case, it was something even more banal: Flying from the Netherlands to London several years ago, her seatmate asked if she liked the book she was reading. So began their eight-month courtship, which ended when Ms. Sinclair, 26, a British and Dutch dual national, moved to The Hague.

Another highly effective manoeuvre to get small talk going, Kevin D. says, is paying a compliment to someone you’re interested in. If the advance is met with awkward silence – or you’re not keen on someone else who is putting on the moves – there’s always the legitimate excuse of having a plane to catch.

~ The Globe and Mail

7 Questions for a Matchmaker

One of the many things that sets It's Just Lunch apart from the competition is the strength and experience of our matchmakers. Recently, we reached out to longtime IJL Columbus matchmaker, Pamela Lanier to see if she could share some quick tips with us.  

1) What's your best dating tip?

My best dating tip is to ask questions. This makes the other person feel important. Also, you'll find out what your date's interests are and see if you can have fun together. IF YOU DON'T PLAY TOGETHER, YOU WON'T STAY TOGETHER.

2) What are men looking for?

Men are interested in the visual first. It's how they're made.

3) What are women looking for?

Women are interested in the whole package.  A woman can meet a man who may not look exactly like what she thought her special someone would look like, but after she sits across from him for an hour and hears what's in his heart he automatically becomes soooooo handsome.

4) How many serious relationships have you started?  Any marriages?

I've been doing this for over 33 years so I've lost count of how many relationships and marriages there are. They call me about their kids now.

5) What's your favorite client story?

There was a woman with young twins. She was struggling to meet a good guy, and had actually had men get up and leave the table on dates when she told them about her kids. I told her, 'No problem', because the men I match you with will know in advance about the twins and they will only be men who love kids. She went on her first few dates and had fun. Then I matched her with Todd.  They hit it off immediately. He'd also been left to raise a young child on his own. As an executive for a major company here in Columbus, I knew he was busy but still made time for his son. They married two years later and she still calls me every year to say thanks. 

6) What's the best place in Columbus for a first date?

The best place in Columbus for a first date is the Short North. You have any kind of restaurant and food you want. You have galleries and shops, and you can finish off your date at one of the famous ice cream or coffee shops in the area.

7) Why should singles call IJL?

Singles should call IJL because we are great at what we do.  

~ Dating Spider

Turning Business Travel Into Pleasure

Oh come on – you’ve noticed those cute guys on the airplane. (Although why does it seem they never get seated next to you – and you get stuck with the grandma from Iowa City?) But when you do have the opportunity to chat up a cutie, don’t waste it! The ladies at It’s Just Lunch Chicago shared these tips with us for breaking the ice in the sky. But you don’t just have to be traveling on business, right? What’s more pleasurable than a little mile-high flirtation?

How To Date When You Travel For Business
Unique Ways To Break The Ice In The Sky

Think you can’t date if you travel often for business? Think again! Although shuffling between busy schedules, flights and living out of a suitcase can be challenging, dating during business travel is easier than one might think. Dating expert and Director of It’s Just Lunch, PJ Osgood says that your life doesn’t have to stop when you board a plane. “Think of traveling for business as an adventure and a great way to have a couple hours of complete and undivided attention from a person you sit next to. There are a couple of simple tactics that I use when I fly, and they work almost every single time. I’ve met some great people when traveling for work,” notes Osgood.  So what are PJ’s business traveling tips for singles?

• Always be prepared.  No one wants to sit next to coffee breath that smells terrible, so bring gum! If you are going to strike up a conversation with the cute stranger sitting next to you, then you need to make sure you have your bases covered. Pop a piece of chewing gum in your mouth – trust me the cute stranger next to you will thank me!

• Un-assigned seating is the best! “I love flying on Southwest for the very reason that I have the freedom to sit where I please. Take the middle seat next time you fly and keep your eyes peeled for the cuties. I’ve met so many wonderful people when sitting in the middle seat on a flight. You just never know who might choose the aisle,” notes Osgood.

• Bring your business cards. You want to be prepared. Just like you wouldn’t step into an interview or business meeting without some way for them to contact you, the same rules apply when you fly. Always, always, always bring your business cards. That way if you hit it off then you both have ways to remain in contact with one another.

• Be generous. Some companies offer incentives like free drink tickets when you are frequent flyer. Next time you fly bring two and share. It’s a great way to break the ice and start up a conversation. Your new friend will be appreciative and more prone to strike up a conversation.

• Share a ride and save some cash. Most major cities offer a ride sharing program from the airport. If you hit it off in the plane or while waiting in line, then it might not be a bad idea to ask.

The bottom line is that you can meet people regardless of where you are. If the time is right, strike while the iron is hot!

~ Travel Girl Magazine

Dating and Social Media: A Few Rules for Success

Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Foursquare - Over the last few years, these networks have completely changed the way we live our lives.  We are connected in new and exciting ways with people... so many people.  

Which begs the question, How does social media affect dating?  

Well, much like other technology, sometimes social media can get in our way.  In order to prevent that from happening, it's important to be thoughtful about how we use it, the messages we're sending out, and how we interact online with the people we're dating.

Here are a few smart rules to follow:

1)  Be conscious of the fact that your date will google you. Make sure that the information available about you online is consistent with the story you're telling about yourself. Update and clean up your online image, as required.  

2)  Remove the pictures of you and your ex(es) from your facebook and other social networks.  

3)  Don't tweet or post status updates about your dates. Those updates might not be as private as you think they are.  

4)  Be cautious about adding your date to your social network. The first date is probably (definitely) too soon. Wait until you're sure about how you feel for this new person, and vice versa.  Unfriending is awkward.

~ Senior Dating

Singles event tries to get Santa Cruz women interested in Silicon Valley bachelors

The Society of Single Professionals and the group It's Just Lunch, combine forces for a singles mixer at Peachwoods on Tuesday.

Hayne Bendick glanced around the bar at Peachwood's Tuesday night, and then speared another bite of her complimentary watermelon.

"It's a little slim pickings, tonight," she said. "I've only seen one person that I'd really like to converse with, but he was already snapped up." Bendick gestured in the man's direction. He stood nearby, hair neatly combed, animatedly talking to another woman.

Fortunately, I'm getting all the watermelon I can eat."

After being referred by a friend, Bendick, 51, a Santa Cruz resident, went to the Inn at Pasatiempo to find who she calls "Mr. Almost Right." After putting a focus on her career -- she's part owner at the Center Street Antiques collective in Soquel, and has started four other businesses -- Bendick has never been married, doesn't have kids, and this was her first time at a singles event, she said.

About 40 other people swirled around her, pairing up, playing a "mixer" game called "Find Somebody Who " -- "Find somebody who yachts in their spare time" is a sample question -- drinking and eating the free hors d'oeuvres provided by organizer Rich Gosse, founder of The Society of Single Professionals.

Gosse, who throws about 150 such parties all over the world each year, billed the meet-up at Peachwood's as "Silicon Valley Meets Silicon Beach." The cost was $10. Gosse invited professional men from over the hill to socialize with Santa Cruz women.

Gosse started the society 32 years ago in San Rafael. He met his wife at one of his own events 12 years ago. Gosse said Santa Cruz women complain about the lack of available men in the area.

"Santa Cruz women love to meet the Silicon Valley bachelors," he said. "If you talk to the women in Santa Cruz, they say the men are all starving artists, gay or college students. And Silicon Valley is the only major metropolitan area in the U.S. to have a surplus of single men."

The Tuesday night crowd was a bit smaller than normal, Gosse said, where a party could fetch up to 200 people. He mentioned a party in Australia where he had to turn away 1,000 people. Still, he was happy with the results.

"Every day you meet people who are secretly attracted to you," he said. "But nobody ever talks to strangers. My job is to help you find a relationship of quality."

~ Santa Cruz Sentinel

A matchmaker can help you find love, if you don't mind the price

In an ideal world, we'd all find our matches naturally -- no help from any online aids, set-ups, whatever. However, in this day and age, it's fair to say that sometimes we may all need a little help (just a little shouldn't hurt now should it)?

That said, it's not unusual to pay for online dating services. Online dating sites like Match.com and eHarmony, for example, which boast tons of happy members, do charge to give you access to their other users. But what if the price tag is a little higher? How much would you be willing to pay to find your perfect match?

Apparently, for some, the price they're willing to pay is pretty steep -- with some services charging a minimums of $50,000, even...

According to a Time Magazine story that appeared yesterday, it looks like despite the economy, people are willing to pay top dollar for help in love, charging up to half a million dollars for professional matchmaking services.

Over the last few years, paying for this kind of thing isn't uncommon, nor are the high price tags. Shows like "The Millionaire Matchmaker" and services like "It's Just Lunch" have marketed their success in helping busy professionals find companions or lifelong mates. It's also gained a bit of exposure too, as matchmakers like Joanna and Steve Ward, whose work has united several now married couples, bring their matchmaking expertise into the mainstream, using it to help single women find love on national television (as hosts of the VH1 series "Tough Love").

The matchmaking phenomenon is interesting, resembling a time when, in some cultures, families enlisted the help of someone who would help their children find the perfect spouse for marriage. And, while it's evolved, matchmaking is another option to consider if you want someone who has the time to help you find the love they're looking for.

Ultimately, matchmaking has increasingly made it to the forefront and may give potential daters another avenue -- as long as they're willing to pay the price, that is. Whether it's here to stay remains to be seen. However, as people look for other ways to find dates, you have to wonder if the matchmaking thing will really catch on -- and maybe bring its price down to give more people a chance to have someone work to find them love.

I respect the process, especially if you have that extra stash to give it a shot. Personally, I plan to hold out for just a bit longer, just in case I can find it the old fashioned way (or at least until the price drops and makes it more cost-effective in this day and age)! Call me hopeful, I guess.

However, that said, in a couple more years, maybe I'll give it a chance -- IF I think I could use a bit of help. Hopefully the price tag will have dropped!

~ Chicago Now